I’m currently in an interesting state of apathy. Life’s weird when you spend all your energy getting good grades to get into a good university, but then you find out that grades don’t matter, because you’re going to art school, and shortly after you discover that your “good university” really sucks ass and the person you know who’s happiest with their current school is going to a safety school…

I guess the moral of the story is to not try to plug away at something because of this idea that “one day this will matter”. Do work, but put your energy into what you enjoy. With all your energy poured into what you like doing, who knows, maybe you will be able to use that skill “usefully” some day… and if not, at least you didn’t waste a great deal of time.

It’s really easy to get sucked up into this success gridlock, where everyone is working hard at what they hate to “make something” of themselves. People get so obsessed with acing these hurdles set up by authority figures that they forget the things that really matter in life, including themselves and their own happiness.

My school is way too obsessed with success for its own good. And by success I mean this arbitrary idea of getting ahead, of producing all you are supposed to without really taking the time to ponder the purpose of it all. Sometimes it feels like the world is a large machine pushing its inhabitants to do arbitrary tasks because if everyone where to think about the “why” all of our social structures would fall apart.

Why do we work so hard anyway? If spend all this energy creating commodities so we can buy stuff to throw out the next season, what have we really produced, in the end?